Ways to support a friend after losing a pet

The animals we choose to share our lives with become cherished members of our families. So, knowing the best way to support a friend who has suffered the loss of a much-loved dog, cat, or horse can be tough.

Understanding the different stages of grief can be a useful first step when deciding how best to be there for a friend who’s sadly lost a loved one.

However, you may have more questions as to ways you can help a friend going through a heartbreaking loss. Read on to discover how to support your friend while they face the challenges of bereavement…

What should I write in a pet loss card?

For many, receiving a bereavement card from a friend in the wake of losing a beloved dog, cat, or horse can be comforting.

Sometimes, all it takes is a thoughtful note handwritten in a carefully chosen card to convey the important message that you’re there for your friend. But, writing a meaningful message in a pet loss card is often easier said than done.

Here are some phrases to inspire you as to what to write in a pet bereavement card:

Idea 1 – Losing a loved one is heartbreaking. I realise there’s not a word in the world that could help you feel better in this moment – so, please know that I am here for you.

Idea 2 – I’m sure [pet’s name] knows how lucky they were to be loved by you. While they may not be here in the same way anymore, [pet’s name]’s [pawprints/hoofprints] have been captured forever through your memories of them.

Idea 3 – While [pet’s name] will be sorely missed, their story will live on, as they’ll forever be part of your story. Thinking of you and your family during this difficult time.

Idea 4 – So sorry for your loss. When life without [pet’s name] feels overwhelming, please reach out to me and I’ll be there.

Idea 5 – Across Rainbow Bridge, a lost loved one called their name – so they can enjoy freedom and fun, without worry or pain. Although your life won’t be the same, their love is always with you, until you meet again. Sending love at this difficult time.

How do I let my friend know I'm here for them?

It’s impossible to take away a friend’s grief, though here are some ways you can let them know you’re there for them.

Listening to what they want

For instance, have they asked for space, or would they prefer someone to sit with them and talk about fond memories of their pet?

Acknowledging the significance of their loss

Tell your friend you understand the huge impact the loss of their dog, cat, or horse will have on their life – and reassure them that how they’re feeling is normal.

Making sure they’re taking care of themselves

Sending text reminders to eat dinner or cooking a hearty meal and taking it to their house, for example.

A bouquet of colourful flowers

Is it appropriate to share my own pet loss experience with my friend?

Knowing someone they’re close to has been through a similar experience can be comforting for many people – and they may even ask you to share your story with them. Yet for others, hearing more stories about the devastation of losing a loved one could be too much for them to process while they’re still grieving.

Everyone grieves in a different way. Therefore, whether or not it’s appropriate to share your own pet loss experience with a friend in the throes of grief will depend on their unique situation.

If there’s any uncertainty surrounding your friend’s readiness to hear about others’ experiences of loss, let them know there are organisations offering free support instead.

Here are a few of the organisations you could recommend to your friend:

Additionally, you could suggest your friend visits our Pet Bereavement Hub, where they’ll discover a variety of resources and information to help them cope with the loss of their pet.