Losing a much-loved pet as a vet

No-matter when or how you lose your beloved dog, cat, or horse, the experience is heartbreaking. However, when we’re in the throes of grief, it’s all too easy for us to feel alone in our sadness. 

For animals who are put to sleep, a vet will be part of that final page of their story – so it can be comforting to know our vets understand what we’re going through.

Our Head of Veterinary Services, Jen Wormleighton, shares with you her two devastating losses, to help you feel less alone as you say goodbye to a treasured pet…

Saying goodbye to Biddy

“As a vet and a pet owner, I wear two hats. When my own pets get ill, I really struggle to look objectively at my pet's case. 

When I said goodbye to my old rescue terrier, Biddy, I felt like I'd lost my best friend. It's still raw 3 years later, and it's ok to feel like that. 

We were still in lockdowns when she was put to sleep, so I was on my own in the room at the practice. She was very old, dehydrated and ill, and as a vet, I understand the potential difficulties with finding a vein to inject into, on a patient like her. 

I was with her until the end, and wanted to be, not because it was easy to see, but because I couldn't leave her. 

I'm confident from talking to the vet team who were caring for her, that it was the right decision at the right time, but I will never stop missing her.”

Saying goodbye to Woody

“A month before I lost my rescue terrier, Biddy, we lost our elderly black labrador, Woody. 

Woody was my husband's dog, and Biddy was mine. We knew Woody was old for his breed, and we knew he was struggling with his joints and itchy skin. We managed it all as well as we could. 

We decided to have a family holiday abroad, and arranged for Woody and Biddy to go into a lovely pet hotel of their own for the week, warm, comfortable and together. They'd been there before and the owners of the hotel knew Woody's ailments well. 

Two days before we were due to fly home, we received the call no pet owner ever wants to hear... Woody had collapsed and was being taken to his vets. We ended up making the decision to put Woody to sleep over the phone, in a layby just outside Paphos, Cyprus, racing back to start packing to come home early. 

Depending on the number of seats we could get, at least my husband was going to jump on a flight to be with Woody... But it was too late. Woody was passing and we wouldn't get back to the UK in time. We said our goodbyes on a FaceTime call. Never enough at such a precious moment. 

Woody had dictated the timeline in the end, something we are still grieving over now. One moment of comfort from our vet practice was that they allowed us to visit Woody upon our return, spend some time with him even though he'd already passed. We also got his ashes back, so he could come home again and sit in front of the fire (his favourite place). 

You'll also have read previously in this article about my second pet loss, just 4 weeks later. We couldn't be there for Woody, but it cemented my decision to be there for Biddy when her time came.”

Where to access pet loss support

So, as you can see, vets sympathise with how you’re feeling when it’s time for your pet’s final appointment – since it’s likely your vet is a pet parent, too. 

While your vet can support you throughout the process of saying goodbye to your dog, cat, or horse, it’s important to reach out to others if you’re struggling with loss. For many of us, pets become a huge part of our families, so losing them feels just as painful as if we were to lose a human loved one. 

Here are some of the services available to help you cope through the different stages of grief:

Please visit our Pet Bereavement Hub to access a range of free resources to help you through this difficult time. 

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